Never Nap with a Loaded Rifle: An SML Review of “The Sasquatch Murder”

If you follow news surrounding the evolution of man—as we all do—you’ll know that every few months, archaeologists seem to come across a new tooth, jawbone, or pinky toe that could rewrite early human history as we know it. When did humanity first wander out of Africa? At what point…

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The House that Ghosts Built: An SML Review of Winchester

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: The only thing creepier than movies with possessed kids is a really solid haunted house movie. And the only thing creepier than a haunted house movie is a haunted house movie with possessed kids. You may disagree, but my particular kryptonite…

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525. Monsters Like Getting around Customs Issues

525. Monsters Like Getting around Customs Issues

Things we’ve tried to get through customs on our way to a relaxing weekend at Monster Island: Cuban cigars Toys made with lead paint Buckets of ants Wormwood Finger sandwiches Machete hands Missile launchers A human-sized jar filled with 100 brains One human brain dived into 100 Mason jars A…

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524. Monsters Like Roseanne

Because she made it flippin’ mandatory for all sit-coms to do a cool Halloween episode every season. And if your show does NOT do a cool Halloween episode, then you suck. That’s it. Eternal thanks to Roseanne.

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523. Monsters Like Aviation Theory

And the best way to learn how planes work is to take them apart. Especially while they’re operating. It helps you to see the inside components. And it really clarifies what is important about keeping an airplane in the sky, and what isn’t.

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522. Monsters Like a Pragmatically-Tailored Suit

522. Monsters Like a Pragmatically-Tailored Suit

Quick little history lesson. The Irish theater actor, Hamilton Deane, had way more to do with the creation of Dracula than you think. Deane designed Dracula’s tuxedo with a cape and a high-standing collar. Why? It was for a stage trick. During the 1920s London run of Dracula, the actor…

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521. Monsters Like Dramatic Family Reunions

Your father died before you were born. Your mother gave you up for adoption. She had many reasons, but what reasons are enough to give up your own child? Your own flesh? Even though you never knew them, your parents’ actions informed your entire life. It wasn’t an entirely miserable…

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