28. Monsters Like Creating an Apocalypse

Aside from stamp collecting and rowing crew, working to destroy the universe is a monster’s favorite pass time. And every monster worth his weight in slime knows that a definite first step to destroying the universe is to create an apocalypse.

Creating an apocalypse will get you some attention. There’s no better way to show your monster colleagues that you’re a badass, take-charge kinda monster than by causing chaos, mayhem, and destruction on a large scale (see earlier post “Destroying Tokyo“). And better still, if you succeed at destroying all life around you, maybe you can finally get one measly day of peace and quiet without being harassed and hunted by those pesky human villagers! Gosh!

Sorry. I digress. Like I was saying…

Imhotep has tried it by bringing back the ten plagues of Egypt. I think he forgot that the plagues were first sent by a different god than he subscribes to. Still, it got his name out there.

I can’t tell you how many countless warlocks, priestesses, and disgruntled postal workers have tried to call up some demon, hellhound, or even Mr. S. himself to help with their apocalyptic efforts. Not only did they all roundly fail, but they couldn’t even make a name for themselves because they were overshadowed by their demonic assistants.

Piece of advice: aim high, but if you want the credit, do the work yourself. No great monster was ever credited with asking someone greater to create a proper apocalypse.

28. Creating an Apocalypse

Sarah G

What do you get when you cross a horror movie with a pile of books? She’s not always sure, but Sarah G is always there to find the connection. In the process, she has helped found a local nonprofit, started a satirical holiday, ticked off celebrities, and tried to purchase the lunar surface.

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