35. Monsters Like Medallions

Every Hepcat swinging monster about town needs only two things: cool clothing and easily-controlled mind slaves who carry out evil wishes quickly and without fees.

Luckily, a monster can achieve both of these things with one fashion accessory: a trendy medallion complete with the hypnotic powers of darkness and the netherworld.

One glance into its ruby-red jewel and mortals will be standing in line to drone, “Yes Master.”

The one flaw in the plan is that mind-controlled slaves are very efficient at running errands and creating mayhem but not so good at vacuuming.

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Jimmy

Jim MacKenzie is an amateur futurist on his way to guru-hood. He studied journalism and works in television. Jim writes for several blogs, including The Incredible Vanishing Paperweight and the satirical horror site StuffMonsterslike.com. Jim and his SML co-blogger, Sarah Giavedoni, have started a holiday, ticked off celebrities and tried to purchase the lunar surface. In his spare time, Jim likes listening to rock music, reading, giving away free books at his nonprofit "The POP Project" and trying to catch the real Thomas Wolfe Home arsonist.

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