407. Monsters Like Impossibly Small Tunnels

Welcome. Or rather, beware!

That’s the message we prefer to send at the entranceway to our underground lairs. We find that our message is heightened proportionally to the diminished width and length of said entrance. In keeping with our tendency to prefer things dark and undeniably creepy, the smaller the entrance and longer the tunnel, the better the entranceway—for us, at least.

And still, you’re compelled to join us at whatever awaits you on the other side of the tunnel. That’s your prerogative, I guess.

Do you feel that sense of fear on the back of your neck as you journey through? Or is it just a chunk of tunnel (or scalp) as your head scrapes along?

Wiggle and waggle as fast as you can, future dinners. Just don’t get stuck.

Unlike you, pesky mortals, monsters aren’t limited by the width of our pelvises.



Sarah G

What do you get when you cross a horror movie with a pile of books? She’s not always sure, but Sarah G is always there to find the connection. In the process, she has helped found a local nonprofit, started a satirical holiday, ticked off celebrities, and tried to purchase the lunar surface.

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