Dear Advice Monster:
I’m just a little pond monster. I want to make some friends, but everyone wants to play with the big lake monster up the road. What should I do?
Signed,
Wet and Whiny
Dear Whiny:
Have you tried starting your friendships by kidnapping people and pulling them down to the depths with you? We knew a lake monster this worked really well for, until that unfortunate incident with the villagers…
Best of Luck,
Advice Monster
Special thanks to Kayla for inspiring this serious question.
