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Home Posts tagged "alone in the dark"

Tag: alone in the dark

575. Monsters Like Making an Appearance in Your Bedtime Stories

Science shows that a bedtime ritual is important for preparing both the mind and the body for sleep. Drink a cup of warm milk. Brush your teeth. Put on socks. Take off socks. Whatever you do in your routine, you probably do it more or less every night. And the…

Read more…if you dare

Sarah G July 9, 2019 July 9, 2019

501. Monsters Like that You Refuse to Take Advantage of Modern Conveniences

501. Monsters Like that You Refuse to Take Advantage of Modern Conveniences

Turn on the light! Turn on ALL the lights! Why are you wandering around in the dark, stupid? Don’t you know there’s a killer in the house?!

Read more…if you dare

Sarah G August 24, 2017 August 19, 2017

475. Monsters Like a Lack of Photons in the Spatial Array of Input Data to our Ocular Sensory Observations

Monsters like when the lights go out.

It’s the dark, people. The dark. It’s just a fancy way of saying that monsters like when the lights go out. That’s all.

Read more…if you dare

Jimmy January 18, 2017 March 6, 2017

469. Monsters Like that Flashlights Never Work

We read somewhere that a flashlight was really just a plastic tube to store dead batteries inside. And boy, do we monsters know it? We thrive in the darkness. Flashlights do not. This is why we will always win. If you want our advice, don’t take the time to fidget…

Read more…if you dare

Jimmy November 29, 2016 March 6, 2017

464. Monsters Like When the Lights Go out in Your Bedroom, and Your Mind Swiftly Remembers Every Single Horror Movie You’ve Ever Seen, and Suddenly, Like Magic, All the Creepy Horror Characters are There in Your Room, Standing in the Corner, Waiting for You to Fall Asleep

464. Monsters Like When the Lights Go out in Your Bedroom, and Your Mind Swiftly Remembers Every Single Horror Movie You've Ever Seen, and Suddenly, Like Magic, All the Creepy Horror Characters are There in Your Room, Standing in the Corner, Waiting for You to Fall Asleep

Read more…if you dare

Jimmy October 26, 2016 March 6, 2017

458. Monsters Like When You Dip in Your Toes

Timid? Shy? Don’t like taking off your clothes in front of your friends? That’s fine. We sympathize. We have a solution. When your unabashed wanton friends go upstairs to screw, take off your shoes and just dip in your toes. That’s all. Just your toes. It’ll be fine.

Read more…if you dare

Jimmy August 31, 2016 March 6, 2017

398. Monsters Like When You Say “I’ll be Fine” before You Run out into the Woods Alone

When you see it on television or in a movie, you always cringe: “I’ll be fine alone in the dark woods with a flashlight we both know doesn’t work well or a rusty lantern that could be taken out with one light breeze.” “Don’t worry! What could possibly happen as…

Read more…if you dare

Sarah G June 3, 2015 March 6, 2017

362. Monsters Like Forty Years of Eternal Darkness, the Dead Rising From the Grave, and Dogs and Cats Living Together

Yes. Tremble! The final sign of the Apocalypse is here.

Read more…if you dare

Jimmy September 9, 2014 March 5, 2017
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