Statistically probable deaths are so boring. They’re ubiquitous. Most people will die from a predictable and probable death. These include heart disease, cancer, diabetes, strokes, and Alzheimer’s disease. Mostly brought on by lack of exercise, bad diet, or bad genetics. Most people you know, including yourself, will die from one…
You know what you never see monsters suffer from? Dementia. Osteoarthritis. Chronic pulmonary…anything. Our lives may often be cut short—regularly by you meddling kids. I, for one, have been killed at the end of fourteen consecutive summer camp seasons. And still, I always come back for more. There are others…
There’s nothing quite like the stink of fear, am I right? Even from a distance, its ephemeral fetidness at once draws in and repels. Fear’s attraction reaches beyond those like us who seek out its victims for our own sordid gain. Indeed, the tendrils of fear’s temptations wrap around the…
“Ooh, Gina, the guy at the end of the bar is checking you out.” “No, he’s not, Becks.” “Sure he is. He’s not looking at me. Look!” “Oh, my gosh. He’s totally staring! What a creeper.” “Ladies, drinks compliments of the gentleman at the end of the bar.” “Gina, I…
Since 1805, Monstey Awards have been presented each spring to the best and baddest in the world of horror and the macabre. For over 200 years, the 10-member awards committee has convened in a top secret location in the heart of Glendale, CA to choose four exceptional monsters to honor.…
I, Wilfred Peabody Nobel, being of sound mind and body, do hereby bequeath my estate, including all land, business holdings, and stolen NAZI art, to my nephew and sole heir, Mr. George. A. R. Nobel, on the condition that he meets the following criteria: Be himself of sound mind and…
After all, it’s just more planet for us.
Submit an idea here.
Featuring movie essays from the Head Monsters of SML and others that explore our love for horror cinema! Published by the Collinsport Historical Society.
