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Home Posts tagged "Monster"

Tag: Monster

491. Monsters Like Waiting Until the Climax to Finally Make that Soul-Searching Revelation that They were, All Along, from Page One, the True Embodiment of Evil Run Amok

491. Monsters Like Waiting Until the Climax to Finally Make that Soul-Searching Revelation that They were, All Along, from Page One, the True Embodiment of Evil Run Amok

Read more…if you dare

Jimmy May 24, 2017 May 24, 2017

403. Monsters Like Being Sweet

Add a chocolate bar and roast him over some graham crackers and he’s the most delicious monster you ever invited to your cookout.

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Jimmy July 15, 2015 March 6, 2017

349. Monsters Like When You Put Our Stickers on Your Car So We Know to Avoid You Because You are Likely a Douche Bag

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Jimmy May 28, 2014 March 5, 2017

176. Monsters Like Alpha Males

These tough dudes always posture like they’re tough, but their strength is no match for the super-paranormal. No mere wedgie or noogie can stop us. We know your weaknesses. We can smell them. And after tonight, you’ll never forget them again. Who’s the Alpha Male now?

Read more…if you dare

Jimmy December 7, 2012 February 26, 2017

175. Monsters Like Ruining Important Family Events

There’s a time to welcome your nerdy cousin into town for the weekend. There’s a time to gift-give around the family Christmas tree. There’s a time to celebrate your daughter’s graduation from third grade. And there’s a time to get to the car and drive as far away from your…

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MonsterStuff December 2, 2012 February 26, 2017

78. Monsters Like Inhabiting Abandoned Houses With “Dubious” Pasts

Monsters have been spotted living in many strange places around the world. I personally know an evil gnome who lives solely inside one of Bigfoot’s left footprints. But spooky old houses offer a number of things not available in barns, trailers, or your Uncle Rob’s duplex apartment. The rent is…

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Jimmy October 7, 2011 April 26, 2014

56. Monsters Like Overly Dramatic Theme Music

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Sarah G June 21, 2011 April 26, 2014

Monster Advice Column

Dear Advice Monster: My big sister is really mean to me. I am only 5 years old. What should I do? Chrissy Dear Chrissy: Have you ever tried hiding in her closet until she’s asleep so you can eat her toes? If not, give it a shot. That seems to…

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MonsterStuff June 6, 2011 April 22, 2014
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