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Home Posts tagged "running"

Tag: running

469. Monsters Like that Flashlights Never Work

We read somewhere that a flashlight was really just a plastic tube to store dead batteries inside. And boy, do we monsters know it? We thrive in the darkness. Flashlights do not. This is why we will always win. If you want our advice, don’t take the time to fidget…

Read more…if you dare

Jimmy November 29, 2016 March 6, 2017

318. Monsters Like High Heels

I can’t wait. This sounds like so much fun. A party in a corn field in the middle of the night. I mean, what could be more fun? I’m sure everything will be okay. What am I wearing? High heels, of course. They’re uncomfortable, and I can’t run in them.…

Read more…if you dare

Jimmy December 17, 2013 May 23, 2020

247. Monsters Like Running With Sharp Objects

Read more…if you dare

Jimmy May 19, 2013 February 26, 2017

171. Monsters Like Running Amuck

Amuck! Amuck! Amuck! Amuck! It’s a friendly-sounding word for a berserking demon-fueled rampage.

Read more…if you dare

Sarah G November 20, 2012 February 26, 2017

26. Monsters Like Weak-Ankled Women

Monsters understand the benefits of exercise. While most people power walk in place of their lunch break or go for a jog after dinner, monsters prefer to combine their mealtime with cardio work. Since they’re chased almost as often as they chase others, it is important to maintain a high…

Read more…if you dare

Sarah G February 1, 2011 May 23, 2020
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